Unusual and original, unique and cool keyword blog special.

In the last few days I have been attempting to rescue my website from the neglected dark corner of the internet it currently occupies by educating myself about SEO or Search Engine Optimisation for those of you who are similarly ignorant as to how the web works. In short SEO is a tactic whereby it is possible to increase traffic to your site by cramming keywords into your product descriptions, image tags and blogs. The keywords you select are based on educated guesses as to what you think your likely customers might be searching the internet for.

In my case this might be any of the following: screen-printed t-shirts, t-shirts printed by hand, artisan t-shirts, limited edition t-shirts. The problem with using any of these as keywords is that there is lots of competition who make t-shirts in the same way. I need something that marks me out from my competition. So I move to focusing on the content of my designs or jokes as many people call them.

Odd humour t-shirts, strange t-shirts, weird as fuck t-shirts, ham t-shirts, slyly amusing t-shirts, bizarre t-shirts, bad joke t-shirts, Dad joke t-shirts....

This is better but I need to find a wording that is less negative and suggestive of nervous breakdowns. So now I'm onto: unusual and witty t-shirts, unique and cool t-shirts, original and idiosyncratic....blah, blah, blah.

It's torture isn't it? How has the world come to this? 

Know your customer everyone is telling me. What are they like? What do they like? The only thing I'm sure about when it comes to my customer base is that they're the ones who get the jokes. I might sell the odd t-shirt to someone who for want of a better argument just likes ham (see "There's only ham" t-shirt fiasco) but these are in a minority. For the most part my customers understand there is a joke or some ironic intent and decide they want to wear it or give to a friend or family member because they think it fits. The joke that is as well as the t-shirt.

Which leaves me with one of the most unwieldy keywords ever: t -shirts for a minority of individuals who understand irony and appreciate the handmade artisan ethic and limited edition culture of Accidental Republic.

For those of you reading this blog and suspecting I've only written it to get more keywords into my website shame on you for your cynicism. I am hurt and disappointed in your lack of faith. It's like I don't even recognize you anymore.

Oh...